Careful. Carrreful. Be verrrrrrrrry carrrrrreful...

There’s been soooooooo much bad news for Chipotle recently, with one foodborne health scare after another. Slate even declared “Nobody wants to eat Chipotle’s burritos anymore.” Today Chipotle will address investors after a “stock plunge” over the last few weeks, and hopefully stabilize the situation. As can happen with any ongoing controversy, some have begun to…

If only we still had Jack Kirby to really give the Colonel some sex appeal and powerful delts.

Well, interesting news, in case you were wondering how they were going to escape this thing where first Darrell Hammond and then, with extreme self-awareness, Norm McDonald have been imitating the deceased spokesperson of one of the earth’s most well-known brands (even if some Millennials don’t realize there used to be a real Colonel and assume…

Grotesque magician trick with a black bun Burger King burger. “Observe; the bun is presently black—now I consuuuuuume the burger...”

Let us celebrate green poo. (I know that’s gross but it’s relevant, and I’ll explain.) Because I think something good is going on a BK HQ. They’re trying to attract the Millennials by BEING rather than SAYing, mostly. They are BEING different. They are acting like a brand whose store you’d be okay with someone…

Samantha Hoopes is probably a very smart, intelligent, kind and interesting personality. Yet I feel that I am setting the cause of equality and respect between the sexes back simply by using this obvious and appropriate illustration for my blog post. I HAVE BECOME PART OF THIS VEXING CAPITALIST-SOCIETAL CONUNDRUM.

All I know is I feel wrong when one of these ads comes on TV and I’m sitting with my wife and daughter. I feel these ads are setting back our mutual dreams of a world where they only thing that matters is the content of their character. So let’s talk about this idea I…

Panera

I don’t think Bill Nye the Science Guy would consider this a legit, careful, rigorously scientific examination of the topic of food additives: On the other hand, I think most people involved with marketing and corporate communications would consider that a pretty compelling, easy-to-understand, potentially shareable video that helps Panera get credit for “doing what’s…